mending relationship

Sunday April 19, 2009

Wrecked by anger

I’M a 22-year-old local university undergraduate in my third year of study. It has been almost two months now since I broke up with my girlfriend.

We were together for more than a year before our relationship ended. We were both so unhappy at that time and we hada lot of arguments over petty matters.

We tried to sort out our differences many times before but the problem would always end up resurfacing because of me.

I was so stubborn and unwilling to change my ways. I am the cause of so much hurt to her. Every time we argued, I would always let my emotions and rage get the better of me. It would be like a debate, and I was never willing to give in, even when I knew I was wrong.

More often than not, I would raise my voice and utter words so sharp that it could have shattered her heart into pieces. Sometimes, I would run away and leave her alone in tears after an argument.

However, as I calmed down, I would realise how horrible my actions were and would try to patch things up. She would forgive me, because she loved me, and believed that I would eventually change.

I only realised how much I loved her after we broke up. She was such a wonderful, tolerant and understanding girlfriend and I don’t know how I could have pushed her out of my life.

I really regret all of the heartache I brought her. Although we decided to remain friends, at times, she treats me coldly and my heart aches with pain.

I have tried to let go but thoughts of her still keep coming back. I know I don’t deserve a second chance but I just can’t stop loving her. I’m so miserable and lonely now.

Silly Hamster

IF you are still friends, then perhaps she is cold due to disappointment and anger. Sure, you have hurt her but have you tried harder to make amends?

This girl must care a lot to have forgiven you so many times. While you have accepted all the blame, where is your sincerity? Time and again, you allowed your temper to control you. Regrets make feeble apologies if you never tried to be a better person.

Emotional abuse often leads to physical assault. The feeling of power and control can be heady and addictive. If you truly love her, wouldn’t you be able to hold your emotion and temper in check?

You are a bully and a coward. You love this woman but you never tried to stop the abuse. You claim misery and loneliness now but you do not have the courage to change and beg for another chance.

If you cannot help yourself, you do not deserve love and forgiveness.